Post by Jimoh Akeem Oladele (@AKEEMOL)

Some people divorce or change partners because they would rather change partners than change themselves.

They blame the relationship.
They blame their spouse.
They blame incompatibility.
They move on to someone new, hoping the new person will somehow fix what the old relationship exposed.

But sometimes, the problem isn't who you're with. The problem is what you're bringing into the relationship.

Stop holding on to negative habits and destructive behaviours.

If you struggle with dishonesty, divorce the dishonesty.
If you struggle with disrespect, divorce the disrespect.
If you struggle with anger, work on your anger.
If you seek attention outside your relationship, address that need instead of finding another person to validate you.
If you keep sabotaging healthy relationships, take responsibility for the pattern.

You don't always need a new partner.

Sometimes, you need a new version of yourself.

Before you walk away from someone, ask yourself:

“What part of me needs to change?”

Because changing partners without changing yourself can simply mean carrying the same problems into a different relationship.

Don't just divorce your partner. Sometimes, you need to divorce the habits that are destroying your relationship.

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