Post by Adesanya Ayotola (@adesanya_ayotola)

We are often quick to notice people's disfunctional behaviors but we forget that disfunctional behavior is not one word it is two. We focus on the behavior while overlooking the dysfunction that gave rise to it. This is especially true when the behavior is something we know better than, or something we would never do ourselves. We become experts at judging the visible outcome while remaining strangers to the invisible causes.

This is not a call to excuse mediocrity or celebrate harmful behavior. Wrong is still wrong, and accountability still matters. But if the goal of correction is transformation rather than mere condemnation, then understanding must come before lasting change. We cannot genuinely make people better if we refuse to understand why they became what they are. Understanding does not erase responsibility; it equips us to respond with wisdom instead of mere reaction. It allows us to address the roots instead of endlessly trimming the branches.

A community that only condemns behavior will produce people who become better at hiding their struggles. A community that seeks to understand dysfunction while holding people accountable creates an environment where genuine transformation is possible. Perhaps the question is not simply, "Why did they behave that way?" but also, "What disfunction produced this behavior and how do we address it?" Until we ask both questions, we may correct actions without ever healing the person. True transformation begins where accountability and understanding meet.

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