Post by Dr Akundo (@akundo)

Does dating for six years guarantee a better marriage?

No — six years doesn't guarantee a better marriage, and the data actually shows the benefit plateaus much earlier.

The sweet spot researchers keep finding is around 2 years of dating before getting engaged. Couples who wait at least that long have about a 20% lower chance of divorce compared to those who rush in under a year or so, because you've had time to get past the honeymoon phase and see how you handle real life together.

After that, more time doesn't automatically equal more security. Most couples — 53% — date for 2 to 5 years before getting engaged. Only about 17% date for six years or more, so you're in the smaller group, but not necessarily a stronger one. Very long timelines can sometimes mean you're compatible and intentional, but sometimes they can also mean you're avoiding a decision.

What matters more than hitting six years is:
1. Age and readiness. Marrying after 25 lowers divorce risk by about 24% compared to marrying at 20. The current median age at first marriage is around 30.5 for men and 28.6 for women. 2. Quality over length. Studies find that a 6-month engagement on average often leads to a lasting marriage — not because 6 months is magic, but because once you've done the deeper work of knowing each other, dragging out the engagement doesn't add much.
So think of it this way: 6 years gives you a lot of information, which is good, but it doesn't by itself predict success. Are you learning, growing, and making decisions together in those years? That's what moves the needle more than the calenda

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