Post by Like minds🫂 (@ChinnyT)

Few modern relationship trends spark as much disagreement as couples living together before marriage. To some it’s common sense. To others it’s a step that weakens commitment. The argument isn’t just about preference it touches religion, social norms, and what actually happens inside marriages.
Most religious tradition condemn cohabitating before marriage with the view that intimacy between a man and a woman should only be after they have done the religious rite either traditional or church wedding. But time has proven this method to be part of the reasons why some marriages dosnt last, why divorce rate is on the rise. people would want to know they’re compatible before making a lifelong vow. If the goal is a marriage that honors the faith, testing compatibility seems responsible but the question is now "HOW" ?. Compatibility in marriage also includes sexual compatibility, different people have different sex drive, libido level and fantasies, all these can only be exploited through cohabitation before marriage. A man or woman might have a form of sexual dysfunction and decide not to share with the partner only to suprise him/her after marriage. I know of a case where the man kept preaching abstinence and the respect for God by not having intimacy before marriage only to suprise his wife after their wedding with micro Penis. He cannot perform at all as a man rather he arranged his friend to help him get his wife pregnant. It now became a problem for the man when he found out his wife was now meeting his friends without him knowing.
Everyone knows a couple who lived together before marriage and had a great marriage, and a couple who did the same and split in a year. That makes it personal, not abstract.
Societal norms and value is another angle that influences culture of cohabiting before marriage, we can relate that a lot of people are in marriage with partner they know nothing about, a partner that was linked up to each other by friends, relatives or family. This kind of arrangement always brings issues in the future as we keep hearing " I NEVER KNEW YOU WERE LIKE THIS, OHH HAD I KNOWN THIS HOW YOU ARE I WOULDN'T HAVE......" Cohabition gives both parties room to study and understand each other properly, Identify each other's strenght and weaknesses, character, temperament etc then if it's something they can handle and condone then they will make their choice. Cohabition reduces expectations as it already prep you on the possible outcome to certain events. Understanding your partner is the key to marital happiness.
On the other hand, a lot of people might argue, what if after cohabiting with him or her you end up not marrying each other, does that mean you should enter another cohabiting nitch? How long will one keep sharing bed and space before finally getting the right person?.
Most parents condemn their children especially the females when they found out they are leaving with a man, yes it's something every good parent should speak against.
If the goal of marriage is happiness, peace and till death do us path, do you think any action taken to get it right is ever too much?.
Is cohabitation really a bad step towards achieving a lasting happy home?
Can you advise your Son, daughter, friend or relatives to cohabit?

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