Post by Blessing Ojoma Onakpa (@blessing-82)

5 May 2026

A man buys land.
His wife offers to help monitor the workers while he’s at work.

Instead of seeing support, he sees danger.
His fear? “What if we divorce and she claims part of it?”

What exactly is the essence of marriage if two people cannot trust each other enough to build together?

When did my partner become my potential opponent?

These days, many people are not entering marriage with commitment, they’re entering with backup plans, silent calculations, and exit strategies.

Yes, wisdom is important.
Yes, life can be unpredictable.

But if every decision in your marriage is guided by fear of divorce, then what are you really building?

A home… or a contract waiting to collapse?

Marriage was designed to be a partnership, not a battlefield of mine vs yours.

If your spouse cannot stand with you, build with you, and be trusted around what belongs to you, then something deeper is already broken.

So I ask again..

Why are we getting married if we are already preparing for separation?

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Comments

The Wealth architect: Marriage is losing its meaning when trust is replaced with suspicion.
When your partner becomes someone you must guard yourself against, then the foundation is already cracked.

It’s understandable to be wise, but wisdom without trust turns love into a transaction.
You cannot build a lasting home wi...

LekeeLekee User: Marriage, at its core, is the psychological and spiritual merger of two lives into a single unit. When one partner holds back resources or monitors contributions with an eye on the exit, they aren't just protecting their assets; they are actively starving the relationship of the vulnerability it nee...

Titilayo: True partnership dies the moment we prioritize "protecting what is mine" over "nurturing what is ours," turning a union into a cold negotiation where fear of a possible end prevents the beginning of a shared life.

Koko: Marriage loses its meaning the moment your partner starts to feel like a risk to manage instead of a person to build life with.

Nura23tech | AI Growth Strategist | Content & Online Growth: In most marriages today, society has played a wilder role of influence to an extent.

So, what we are seeing today is that many couples are allowing those influences instead of building their own home.

They forgot why they got married and started copying what they see in other peoples marriages....

IPKISS: I have never been a fan of marriage because of the shenanigans I see couples display.

David Onyedikachi: This is painful. That's another reason why we shouldn't just marry for marriage sake.
We should be able to know who we want to settle down with in and out but most times we close our eyes to the signs just because of body attributes. God help us.

Segun Lawrence: That's the reality. People marry for beauty instead of character. Marriage is now on borrowed time.

Rita Ebele Okecha: The family unit is gradually collapsing because of too much emphasis on material acquisition. This leads to a lot of mistrust. Accordingly, each partner is cautious, living with the fear of the future.

Dada Ogbegun: Well. Depend on the man. All i have belong to my wife. Infact, most of my property are in her name. My wife remain my next of kin. And she is actually my treasurer. Women manages economy more than men. Women are better money managers . My wife an example. I do not care what anybody says about that....